The vast majority of mothers of all classes and all educational levels “ depends” on another income. It may come from child support. . . or from a husband who earns $20,000 while she averages $7,000. But “ dependence” more accurately defines dads who count on womens unwaged labor to raise children and care for the home. Surely, “ dependence” doesn’t define the single mom who does it all: child- rearing, homemaking, and bringing in the money (one way or another). When caregiving is valued and paid, when dependence is not a dirty word, and interdependence is the norm— only then will we make a dent in poverty.

It is as if male breadwinners absorbed into their person­alities the independence associated with their ideologically interpreted economic role, whereas the persons of female nurturers became saturated with the dependency of those for whom they care. In this way, the opposition between the independent personality and the dependent personality maps onto a whole series of hierarchical oppo­sitions and dichotomies that are central in modern capitalist culture: masculine/feminine, public/private, work/care, success/love, individ­ual/comm unity, economy/family, and competitive/self-sacrificing.