nieco podobne:

"I'm 25 and STILL I feel like I suffer from not caring for myself much...and also having guilt/anxiety about any progress or accomplishments I may make in my life for myself. Basically I don't feel like I deserve much, if anything at all, ever. I tolerate anything and everything thrown at me, alone, because I never feel like anyone really cares to help me with my problems, plus I don't want to burden anyone. I also have a problem with never wanting to be me. I would always want to be someone else, even growing up, I have always wanted to be another girl, not myself. I always wanted to be the prettier, smarter, faster(sports) girl. I never feel like I have much to bring to the table, in life in general, and especially in relationships and employment. I basically have never wanted to be me. I have struggled all of my life to try and make myself the best version of myself....meaning physically, academically..etc. I try to be perfect. I keep a perfect looking spotless apartment, I keep a perfect job record, finances, relationships..etc. But I feel like I don't even know why I do these things. I have no definition of me...I ask myself everyday these days... "who the hell am I"? I don't know who I am, other then I try to lead this perfect life so other people will like this perfect me."

jediny sposob ako sa vyhnut hentym pocitom je nerobit veci pre seba, ale pre "vyssie dobro", z toho potom ta obsesia hladat co je spravne vo svete a idealy, pretoze to dokazem obhajit.. keby to robim pre seba, tak to nedokazem obhajit, lebo hned skocim na vsetky kritiky, robis to len si egocentrik, namysleny, vyuzivas ludi, nemas empatiu, si zakomplexovany, zly..

keby sa pokusim mat sa rad napriek tomu, ako ma ini ludia neznasaju, tak by som to nezvladol, a musel by som vsetkych takych kokotov vyzabijat za vsetko to ublizovanie.. a to by som bol zase len zly..

vlastne nemam na vyber, mozem sa mat rad len vo veciach, v ktorych mam istotu ze nie som zly

co je inak dost smutne a hlupe

a zase to musim len pochopit preco sa to deje, aby som tych ludi dokazal prestat nenavidiet, aby som dokazal byt sam sebou a zaroven nebyt hitler