Reasons why Star Wars is better than Titanic (PG)

Joke Submitted By: Anonymous


Titanic's big, but it doesn't have hyperdrive.

Star Wars has WAY cooler action figure potential.

Yoda could use the Force to lift Titanic out of the water.

Leia is a princess, a senator, a freedom fighter, and
Jedimaterial; Rose
is just marriage bait.

Ewoks throw better parties than either first class or
steerage.

When flying towards the Titanic, Wedge can't say "Look at
the size of that thing!" and really mean it.

It would be much scarier to get chased around the boat by a
raving madman with a lightsaber as opposed to a handgun.

Titanic is egalitarian by portraying poor people as
sympathetic characters. Star Wars is egalitarian by promoting
bug-eyedamphibians to Admiral.

Said bug-eyed amphibious Admiral manages NOT to lose his
ship.

We know Cal is the bad guy because he sneers at the poor and
treats his fiancee like property. We know Darth Vader is the
bad guy because he strangles people and blows up planets for
fun.

Yeah, Leo can dance, but can he fly an X-wing?

Rose braves icy water to rescue her man. Leia braves Jabba
the Hutt.

Two words: John Williams.

There are always enough escape pods in Star Wars.

Do you know what the Empire does to self-proclaimed "kings
of the world"?

If Luke were handcuffed to a pipe below decks in a sinking
ship, he would use the Force to get the key.

"I'd rather be his whore than your wife" just doesn't have
the same sting as "I'd rather kiss a Wookie."

Han is frozen in carbonite and turned into a wall ornament.
Leo simply freezes.

We knew the boat was gonna sink. But who could've
anticipated "Luke... I am your father"?

Han Solo would've missed the darn iceberg!